Three things happened recently. Before, I was fine and accepting, but then putting those three together made a picture click into place, and now I’m just angry and frustrated.
The background:
Ever since I’ve had my period, they have never been regular. Well, they were regular in that they never stopped. When I was younger, I was taken to a Chinese herbal doctor, because my mum didn’t trust Western medicine. Eventually, I went to my GP alone for a referral to the gynaecologist. My GP told me that he’d actually referred me to this gynaecologist years ago.
That’s one thing that pisses me off.
The background, part two:
In October/November 2007, I saw the gynaecologist. I told him about my periods, he did some blood tests, and did an ultrasound of my ovaries. The report of the ovaries said that they were cystic in appearance, and he diagnosed me with polycystic ovarian syndrome and put me on the Pill. He also told me to lose weight. At the time, I weighed around 56 kilograms, and I’m 165cm tall.
The Pill regulated my periods, which was awesome. I didn’t manage to lose much weight, though. In fact, the second time I went back to this gynaecologist, the first thing he said was, “You didn’t lose weight like I told you to. You actually gained weight! What are you doing?”
The background, part three:
In around June or July 2008, I had a blood test done for my GP, and he commented that I had low potassium, but he didn’t know why. And that was that. I went back to him in August to see what the spots on my arms were, and to get a referral to a dermatologist. Around the time I saw him, I was also gaining weight, and very large, very bright, very red stretch marks appeared across my belly. He said they were just caused by the weight gain.
The background, part four:
I was born in Hong Kong, and I think the gynaecologist and GP are from there too.
The three things that have sparked the reason for this post:
1. My periods this month are completely normal, and this is the first time since the stroke. I also haven’t been on the Pill since the stroke, so this normal period is not drug-induced; it’s all me.
2. I did an interview with a doctor last week, and she said that no doctor ever wants to misdiagnose, and if they did, they would probably feel really bad about it.
3. Today, I was distributing leaflets about a fundraiser morning tea, and one of the people asked for the story. I told them, and then showed them the stretch marks. The stretch marks have faded a lot since last year, but they’re still pretty visible. Her reaction was one of shock, and said that she’s never seen stretch marks that bad even in pregnant women.
Jen being pissed off, in an open letter to her GP and gynaecologist, and family:
Dear everyone,
You really should look beyond your own prejudices, and your own specialty, and look at the WHOLE DAMN PICTURE. I really do not understand why the fuck Asian/Chinese culture has an obsession with weight. Why is weight so often commented on, and why is “You’re fat” or “She’s fat” so often the only thing you have to say about a person? You guys say it while you chuckle at someone’s weight, and you say it like it’s a horrible thing, and the person is lazy, unmotivated, and Very Bad. Why is it that you often have nothing else to say about a person apart from their weight?
And then more specifically to the doctors,
Maybe you should, as doctors, look beyond the weight issue that your culture is so obsessed about. And then again, maybe as doctors, you should think that if there’s something wrong, not be so quick to dismiss it, or to look for a solution only in your own specialty, because that’s all you can deal with.
Because you know what? There is an entire world out there. There is an entire world out there full of reasons for weight gain that are nothing to do with a person’s laziness or motivation, and there is a lot more to a person than just their weight. There is a whole world out there full of crazy and interesting diseases that can explain things like low potassium for no apparent reason, and irregular periods.
I did not have PCOS. I had a disease called Cushing’s, and *that’s* what caused the stretch marks. The stretch marks I had were not from putting in a couple of kilos, and you, as a doctor, should have known that.
You guys are meant to be detectives of the body! We present with a few strange symptoms, like not being able to lose weight despite eating well and exercising, low potassium, florid stretch marks, and irregular periods, and that should make you think, “Hmm, I wonder what’s wrong.” NOT say, “Stop eating lollies and cake and you’ll be fine”.
Maybe you didn’t want to misdiagnose me, and maybe you do feel bad after being CC’d into the reports that my endocrinologist sent. But maybe this can be a learning experience for you as well as me. People are not wholly determined by their weight. Bodies are wonderfully complex, and when weight is just one of the symptoms, don’t get so bogged down by how much they fucking weigh. Look beyond what you have been so used to criticising your entire life, and don’t find some other disease to use as an easy solution.
Cushing’s is shit, and it’s your job to know more about it than me, but from what I’ve read and my own experiences, I’m starting to think I know more about Cushing’s than a lot of doctors out there. Which isn’t right, because *you* are the ones who went to medical school.
